On the Road Again with Father Ralph

By Karen

As he did in 2008, Father Ralph gave us two parting gifts. First, he came over the night before we left for a blessing of the RV. Then, he gave us three CD's of travelogue episodes that he recorded for us to play on our trip.

The first episode featured my Mom who is still in Winthrop Hospital since June 9th recovering from a nasty case of pacreatitis. Mom did a fabulous job reading Father Ralph's script complete with coughing fits. She instructed us to "not to feel bad that we left her all alone here in the hospital bed while you're off galavanting in the south. I'm sure I'll be [cough, cough, cough] alright and I don't want you to feel guilty that you're playing on beaches and seeing the sights with the only thing I have to look at is Father John's face on a fan. So, please enjoy yourselves. I'll try to [cough, cough, cough] hang on until you get back." Mom followed this up with saying how she would be enjoying her visits with her good daughter and son-in-law. She then told us that she would meeting with her lawyer soon to update her will. I can't believe that Mom pulled this off so expertly both in delivery and in secrecy for she would not even let Dad in on the gig when he got wind of it. The kids said that I was bright red while listening to Mom and I definitely had tears in my eyes -- the guilt trip worked and continues to work for invariably Father Ralph ends every episode with "Karen, call your mother."

The second episode was an interview with one of Westbury's famous citizens: the Dean of St. John's School of Law. Father Ralph amazingly picked apart Michael's talk from his installation which is online at the St. John's website. Here's a snapshot of the interview:

Father Ralph: "Now during your last trip I understand that you left your computer case behind at one of the rest stops. Now let's suppose that you left Bridget at one of the rest stops. Would you say to your family, 'Oh, we have to go back and pick up Bridget.' or would you say something else?"

Michael: "We miss her deeply."

Father Ralph: "Oh, come on. You really wouldn't leave Bridget behind at a rest stop, would you? I mean, imagine what she would say to you if you did that?"

Michael: "Professor Simons, that wasn't very nice."

Father Ralph: "You don't make your children call you Professor Simons, do you?"

Michael: "Not tonight."

Each episode begins and ends with the same music that we all have come to identify as "ours" and Father Ralph's. There always a musical selection for us. Some returning favorites are "Nun Names" and "My Old Flame." Often, we get some comedic outake such as Monty Python's interview segment.

Father Ralph's travelogues are a pure gift of creativity and love and we all look forward to our long driving days when we can listen to Father Ralph. It's always good to laugh, hear some interesting music, and bring a little bit of home with us.